No. Not that style.
At this point in the stage of flight instruction, I'm far past the primary learning and mimicking my flight instructor's style. I'm developing my own and experimenting with what works and what I'm comfortable with. Style not only involves the way you handle the aircraft, but also your values, habits, and decision-making process. Given the infinite number of possibilities in which any flight can be conducted on account conditions and mission type, there is considerable variety in how some of my commercial pilot classmates get things done.
Enter myself, J, F, and L, in a room full of maps and 90's-era computers and paperwork, 283.7 miles from home, formulating a last-minute change of plans due to one of the airports we were supposed to stop at on the return leg being out of our weather limitations.To fully understand this situation, imagine four guys, myself included, who have four different ways, different styles, of getting things done. We have four separate planes going to the same place. Add the complicating factor that we all think we're right, and you've got yourself a room on edge. Coming up with a unified plan was nearly impossible. My efforts to get the group to do what I wanted to do were futile.
I have the unusual combination of an aggressive hot-shot flying style, a policy of respectful assertiveness to pilots and support personnel, and a personal philosophy of never being in too much of a hurry to get anywhere too fast. I consider the role of the rules placed upon us in this operating environment to be nothing more than factors to think about in order to maintain a safe and standard operation. The inch and a half thick binder of rules and operating procedures that we're issued goes out the window (just kidding in the literal sense as we have to carry it with us at all times, subject to inspection), but the ideas in it remain in the back of my head. F does everything properly by the book and subtly looks down upon you if you don't. J is anxious to go home, rushing through his preflight work at a blistering pace. L is a cool Asian guy who I can't quite figure out, but in my past experience with him he's been pretty passive and easily influenced when it comes to flight operations.
In the end, we all made it home, in a single-file line, yelling things at each other over the radio (despite F's objections) and having a good time. It's interesting. We all had objections with each others' plans, but there was no harm.
Anyways.
Things with the roommate? Weird as fuck. The background is that he's a bit of a dick. To me and to others in group social situations, he's been a one-upper. Annoying. Thinks he knows everything. Always has to be better than you. And in the dorm? He doesn't do the trash. No sense of responsibility, yet always opens the window when it's thirty degrees out so it doesn't get stuffy in the room. Dumbass. Thinks he's funny when drunk and gets stupid after three drinks. Sleeps til 2 in the afternoon for his 4pm class. Also, he smells and leaves dandruff on the futon (seriously?). Bitches hate smelly rooms and dandruff on the futon. Not that he gives a fuck.
The honeymoon period of the first couple weeks has slowly curdled into distaste, and it's showing. I think I'm showing it. And so is the rest of the floor group, who is visibly annoyed by his presence sometimes, makes fun of him (deservedly), and, recently, has been separating him from them. And I've made an effort to get away from him. It's great, without him being around.
But at the end of the day, we're still roommates. It's tough, then, coming back to the room with him by himself and he asks where I've been. Or what we were doing. I'm torn between feeling bad for him, andguilty about myself and other's actions...or feeling like he brought it upon himself. Leaning towards the latter. But, it's awkward, because I have to maintain this two-faced persona, separating my private thoughts from how I come across. It's confusing, and I've never done this before. And I don't think I can maintain this.
We shall see.
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